Odd prompts, with obvious choices.

Which animal would you compare yourself to and why?

Well, if this isn’t an obvious answer, I don’t know what is.

I would totally compare to a long-bodied cellar spider, or Pholcus phalangioides. These spiders are also more commonly known as daddy long legs, but as this is a synonym for many fairly unrelated arthropods, I’ll stick to the former name. Look them up. I’m sure they also live in your basement, as they do in mine.

The reason, beyond being a dad, and having a fairly long body and legs (Dutch eh?), the reason for this choice is more behavioral in nature.

These dudes completely freak the fuck out if you get close, and I’ve always thought that this is a bit of an overreaction to nothing. I recently learned in my toddler’s arthropod kid book that these dudes do this so they are unrecognizable as prey. They shake themselves into a blur. If this has been tested, or is just mere speculation, I don’t know. But to be frank, I don’t give a flying fuck. It sounds good. For this post that’s all that matters. I’ll do science at other times of the day.

Now, I obviously freak the fuck out about many things too. It’s kind of normal for people with generalized anxiety disorder to do so. And I am panicky as hell sometimes. Despite having lived with this condition for about fifteen years, I have yet to find out the reason why my brain freaks out the way it does.

Maybe it also thinks it can disappear in a blur…

Can you still see me?