Bottomless pit

Two sick kids beaming out vomit in every direction. That’s more or less what our last 24 hours looked like. Or well, more for Heike than for me – this time. After the week of projectile vomiting around Christmas, I’ve had my vomit baptism multiple times over. This time, work saved me.

Yesterday I came home from work, to be welcomed by a very poor-looking chap that had just splatter painted himself and part of the living room with his stomach content. He looked miserable, but he seemed to take the challenge to ‘repair’ his stomach seriously. Sips of Coke. Salty stupid snack sticks that nobody likes. Toast. He remembered grandma’s secret ingredients. He wanted them all. They seem to have done their job, he was alright today.

Overnight, the baby girl also had developed a sense of ‘get the fuck out of my body’ and covered Heike and the bed in a warm and smelly sauce that reminded me of pizza toppings. Well, the pizza that has chunks of eggplant on it, that is. I had a good look at it when washing the sheets. Pretty gross stuff. The kind that doesn’t pass the drain. Now you can’t really give babies a sip of Coke. I think. They certainly can’t have salty sticks. Not sure what to do with this one, as she needs some fixing. I again cleaned the floor once this morning. Heike probably twice after, as I had to leave for teaching duties. The baby’s reach is incredible. It’s also amazing how much volume fits in a nine month old baby’s stomach. You’d think it would be empty at some point, but you’d be wrong. It’s a bottomless pit, but a bottomless pit filled to the rim with muck. She now kept it in since lunch. Let’s hope that it stays that way, but as she just developed a fever it already promises to be a busy night again.

There’s just something about vomit that is incredibly disgusting. It smells, it looks like weird sticky yuk, and people throwing up look absolutely ridiculous. Very off-putting. It’s not a pretty thing. All my life I couldn’t look at it without feeling the urge to burst out myself. Now with these kids, suddenly I’m like Vomit man (I’m negotiating with Marvel about this one). I navigate the sea of vomit without any second thought.

It makes me tired though, sick kids. I’m absolutely drained, but so are they.

Time to fall asleep on the couch!